There once was a lass who was oh so fair,
With lips as red as rubies,
With almond eyes and auburn hair,
And ripe cantaloupes for boobies.
I saw dat bitch up in da club
She was bendin and snappin so I hadda holla
“Yo, Ho, get dat ass ovah here,”
And I made it rain hundies of dollas
I poured Crystal on her dress to make it stick
And then she grind up and down up against my dick
The evening drew on and the lass did tire
So we withdrew and with me she journeyed home
We made love on the stone hearth of the fire
And then we slept til the sun of the morn had come.
I woke up, pins and needles running down my dick
I looked around and bitch was gone!
My T.V. was empty, she emptied my wallet slick
I had to piss, it felt like fire, son!
I had to get me a doctor, turn my head and cough
I had to find out what’s up before my junk fell off
I called for the healer to seek remedy
Hastened to his alchemy shop
He told me to relieve myself and bring it to he
And he’d fashion me a balm to make the loin-fire stop.
I ran to the john, filled the cup, and brought it back
He took it to the lab to get worked
He said, “I’ll find out what you got in a day or three,” ah
Sho’ nuff he called me up the day after that
Said, “I hope she was worth the hurt,
Homey, you got gonorrhea!”